It's not you, it's me.

Dear I don't mean to be a bother,

I hope this letter finds you well. I don't know where to start , so I'm going to be direct and honest with you. This is letter about how I feel towards you, should have been written probably sooner than later , but it is what it is, so here it is .

I appreciate your non-judgemental ways, it's almost like you are a blank page that I can use to fill up with my thoughts. I like that you are low-maintenance, that it's not a requirement to visit and find something special for us to take part in everyday. In a lot of ways this actually makes me come by more often, if that makes any sense.

What I love about you is the way you can convey all the thoughts I share with all my friends and loved ones who I don't get to see and talk to as often as I like. In many ways you are a reflection of my own mind. Well, a rather significant and slightly personal part of my mind.

However, you have made me think, time and time again, that you believe I'm afraid of commitment. But I think that's true to a certain extent, since there's something you don't know about me that you probably should.

A while ago I just hadn't been feeling the same about us and the direction we were heading. A lot of shit happened in my life at the time, as you know and some big changes have been made about the way I work , the way I live , and the way I think. And all of these changes had forced me to make a self evaluation , an internal inventory.

It's just that........... you're not the only one.

There. I said it.

I just feel like we are at the point where we need to be completely honest with each other. But it's not you. You're amazing, special and will always hold a place in my heart. It's me.

It's just that I have needs that cannot be met by being involved with just one blog. I have needs that you can't take care of. And I can't apologize because that's just how I am. You take care of anything I want to share with people, and that's what makes you wonderful.

However, there is stuff I want to write about that I don't want to share. So I have a blog for that. It involves a lot of things like "feelings" and I write about girls. Nobody gets to read that one. But there's more. I also have a blog solely devoted to discussing the advancement of my hopes and dreams and goals. Nobody reads that one either.

You're unique and do things for me that no other blog could ever do. And of course I plan on visiting you a few times a week for the foreseeable future. I just needed you to know.

I couldn't live the lie anymore.



That's me. What a weight off my shoulders. Finally free.

SpAmmy