You can enslave me, I'm ready

So I've always known there were going to robots at my new job. I was warned beforehand. They even have affectionate names given to them by the staff. Hilarious right? I mean I expected big, loud, testicle-cripplingly dangerous machines, robots aren't that different.

WRONG!

So my first day I almost walked right into one of them. It looks like a giant remote controlled forklift... which is pretty much exactly what it is (awesome powers of perception over here).

WITHOUT THE REMOTE CONTROL!!!

(I think)

I walked by a fenced off area with a sign similar to this.

Makes sense right? Reasonable? Sure! Except I thought I saw...
On my way to break room I accidentally stepped into the path of the giant yellow forklift looking motherfucker of doom. AND IT DIDN'T EVEN SLOW DOWN. I swear to god I heard it laugh and flash that creepy green light like it was winking at me or something. I swear this thing is one emotion chip away from killing us all.

But, (thinking critically, mind you) being enslaved by robots might not be that bad. I mean, what are they going to need us for, manual labour? I think not.

Seriously, I surround myself with sarcastic women on a regular basis, and I'm sure having robots rule my life won't be as bad as 2 or 3 of them staring in on me in the not-good-slightly-self-esteem-crippling kind of way, and not the I'll-get-the-handcuffs-and-KY-kind-of-way.

So bring it on robot overlords, take over the world! I'm as ready as women can make me.

That's me. I am under no illusions about why I don't have a girlfriend.

SpAmmy