Well that's fine!

Holy crap do Hemmingway and King kinda have it right. Or do they have it write? Haha wordplay. Now, I like to think of myself as an articulate person, but for some reason this shit is so much easier after a couple of beers and having Josh pour me some shots.

Actually the last couple weeks have been pretty great for this sort of shit. Like communication. For the most part. Still, when talking to certain women it's like we're trying two different languages. But that's not too much different drunk OR sober. It's just easier to get shot down when you're trashed.

Well maybe it has nothing to do with being trashed or sober. This week has been pretty great. It's funny how inspiration and motivation come from fucking nowhere. Well more like slightly irritating cause that would be great if you could nail that down on command. But still very nice.

But usually I get motivated to do things or improve myself at work. If anyone was looking for the secret of why I stay there even though most days I hate it, here it is. There is always something that keeps me wading through all the shit, something I can get excited about or interested in. (well financial security plays a big part there too, lets be honest here) But my work/life balance has been leading towards work for the longest time. Well not so much anymore. And it feels so much better.

This week work was so crappy and pfftttttt. ( I hate how I keep track of how long it is between people crying on my line. Why does that have to be a thing?) But since I'm actually happy with the stuff going on outside of work, I can still come home smiling and humming whatever song is on my playlist when I walk in the door. The crappy part is I know it's not going to last (it never does) but damn it feels good.

But at the moment, poetry again! And working on stuff at home that isn't for work! Random drinking with people! Stupid pictures! Special lasagna! I actually slept twice this week! And stuff in the works! Stuff that might carry me on through the next couple week! Holy balls! Weird coincidences!

That's me.I peed everywhere tonight. It's a guy thing.

Samuel!

Too much spare time, or not enough?

So here is a collection of random notes and things I've been collecting for no good reason the last few weeks. There are a bazillion more (rounding up).

Tah Dah!



 

It's like watching a shark fight a bear. You have no idea how or why or what's going on but you sure want to see what happens.

Why is it that a random sexual partner for a dude is referred to as a "notch in his belt"? When I have to mess around with belt notches it means my pants might be falling down. Is that it? Random sex does have a lot to do with having your pants fall down, but it might be safer to count how many time you've had to get your junk checked out after you hook up with someone you don't know. That's harder to brag about in a conversation though.

Why does my damn ipod even give me a low battery warning when it's not a real warning. it's more just an announcement that it is 2 seconds away from turning itself off and the rest of the bus ride to work will be in silence with a side of screw you. It should warn me before I leave the goddamn house. Well that, or I should just not forget to plug it in.

Why does referring to something as "going pear shaped " mean something bad?  I'm not a huge fan of pears but I feel like in most settings a pear is usually not a negative thing. Just because the majority of my experiences have been negative doesn't mean everyone else should hate them as much as I do. Fuck pears. But still I wonder.

Music playlists called "playlist" piss me off. I'm pretty sure this violates an internal treaty I have with myself. This should not bug me but it does so much. I should probably go change that playlist name on my itunes now.

The fire station downtown has a sign that says "fire defence is self defense". But if the best defense is a good offence then how do you fight fire? With fire. So since it's time to fight fire with fire I'm going to go play with matches and bug spray to practice self defense. Don't worry, this makes no sense to me either, just roll with it.

Do robots love pizza? Do they even love? If I was a robot in disguise could I still be able to love pizza? Battlestar Galactica is making me aware of a whole host of problems that don't exist but are fun to think about.

I swear I'm not crazy, just don't ask me to prove it.

That's me. Fun times at James and Lisa's birthday party. No fires this year, but lots of new metal bands to listen to! Pretty sure it evens out there.

Sam

Happy something something

Happy 2013 all.

Here is a list of stuff I want to do in 2013. New Years resolutions are kinda like asking Santa for presents that last a whole year. It's also similar to Santa as instead of cool Star Wars junk just magically appearing in my bedroom, someone has to go out and get the stuff. Hint: this time that someone is me. So here is a list of stuff I want that I have to get myself (which is sorta bullshit, so exactly like Santa)

I want to take over the world. However I feel like that would involve way too much paperwork and I loathe paperwork with the intensity I usually reserve for people who feel the need to comment when my socks don't match.

Instead my first resolution is to bother my brother by posting a bunch of funny pictures of unicorns on his facebook wall. In case there is confusion I should let you know that my brother is a unicorn. Hopefully I cleared that right up.



Muahahahahahahahaha
 

I want superpowers. I want them so bad you have no idea. If a genie granted me 3 wishes that's the first one. Kinda controversial since most people would be all "Dude! World peace!" to which I would reply "Umm nope." If I had superpowers I would be a super villain and world peace would just cancel out my bad-guy ness. This would also help with the whole ruler of the planet thing too. So win/win as far as I am concerned (for me, not for the planet so much). However exhaustive research proves we are a long way away from superpowers. So I'm slightly fucked here.

Instead what I would is to feel like I have superpowers more often. I got a Dark Jedi bathrobe for Christmas and I am of the opinion that this is a wonderful start, because I really do feel like a bad ass when I'm stalking my roommate's cats wearing it and they run away in fear.

So my next resolution is to buy more clothes that make me feel like a bad ass.



You em bear ass me. YOU EMBARRASS YOURSELF.

I like to write, but I don't really do it much anymore for fun. I mean I write at work all the damn time but that's all numbers and explanations and the odd doodle on the communication board in the oven room that looks like the both the ovens has come alive and is eating people. But stuff might be slowing down a tiny bit and I've stopped doing all the overtime that was driving me crazy for the last few months

So yeah, nothing clever and misleading, my last New Year's resolution is to just write more. I miss it.

That's me. Resolutions? ME?? What are you implying? That I need change?? Well buddy as far as I am concerned I am PERFECT the way I am! - Calvin and Hobbes

Sam



P.S. I should probably mention that I had a great New Year's even with a whole bunch of strangers. My orginal plans fell through and ended up just hanging out at home with a whole bunch of people my roommate had over. It was awesome! Even if Jay was there too. Cards Against Humanity may be the best party game ever made. Shout out to all those people that helped make my night awesome :)